selling the farm
I’m selling the farm. I’m using an estate agent. I’ve contracted a solicitor. All I need to do next is find a Japanese with a gun because my father once said there were only three things he truly hated: estate agents, solicitors and Japanese with guns. He was a RAAF WW2 fighter pilot and created some deadly mayhem up in New Guinea when he was behind the controls of a heavily armed Kittyhawk.
My agent found a buyer who is also an estate agent. They appear to know each other. Double jeopardy. The buyer has no money. In a couple of days I’m supposed to welcome her property valuer so he can appraise my property in order that her bank might consider lending the cash so she can buy my property.
That means to me she’s already borrowed to the hilt and has no mortgage free property she can use for further security.
So she uses my property for her own security before she buys it because without this security she cannot buy it.
Is that how it goes? Does that qualify as a Catch-22 scenario?
Then the estate agent pockets about $50k, the solicitor bills me for about $6k, and I’m out there hunting Japanese and hearing there are a couple running a cafe up at Federal.
Just kidding on number 3, they do exceptional sushi.
Better I should go hunting real estate agents and solicitors instead.
petebowes.com 
Could they be parties to another company already established carrying out land-banking for future development? Land-banking on the outer fringe is rampant in places. They can borrow against future value if the bank is of the same opinion.
Up my way you need about 100 acres to swing a multiple occupancy.
What a weird setup: a proper nest of spiders! Good luck with it all Pete.
They might be spiders but I’ve got snakes … I texted the valuer, he’s due in tomorrow, and advised him to wear high-sided boots as we have a couple of brown snakes roaming the property, not to mention an eight foot python nesting in the roof.
Remind me not to move to Australia!
Blood sucking bush ticks, oversized feral cats, roaming packs of wild dogs, crazed doped out hippies jumping the fences .. diseased rabbits … by the time you buy the property it’s far too late.
So you’re finally coming home to Bondi Pete…😂😂😂You’ll enjoy mixing back in, but things have changed. Get ready for the shock ,keep some of your capital gain profits to pay for your parking and brush up on your Social skills as you will be entering a world of Influencers!! No doubt you’ll be up for the Waverley College old boy’s reunion gatherings.
You can join Andy as guest speaker at Bondi Old Timers morning meetings….walking frames are left at the front door 😂😂😂.