Letter to mr. gordon merchant am osa – billabong doesn’t have to suck.
Dear Gordon, can I call you that? I think we have sorted your problem.
You want to maintain a personal supply of this, and in bulk .. which is perfectly understandable.
– and not everybody is helping. That’s the guts of it. Agreed? Fine.
We have to look at money in a different way Gordo, we have to establish ownership of currency – your ownership in this case. We have researched the findings of the Currency Institute of Chicago, they are the ones who ascertained that the number of different DNA imprints found on a single piece of two year-old folding currency is over 25,000. That means that the tenner in your pocket will in all probability end up in someone else’s kick before the sun goes down.
This is the rot Gordo, and the rot must be stopped.
We have also done some research on your early background and have had it confirmed that you were known as a complete tight-arse when it came to lending wax, this is officially documented. * What was also memorable about those days was that you never borrowed any either.
More confirmation of what you were is evident in certain photographic evidence (held securely by an Avalon source). Evidence that wins you a gong for The Oldest Sluggos in Australia Award, the OSA.
No rot there either matey.
This is what you were Mercho, and you have to ask yourself – where did that guy go? Find him and all will be sweet.
Thank you, It’s been a pleasure.