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the billabong teahupoo 2013 pro – a look at the minor contestants. (5) randy leclolp

The 2011 Tahiti Billabong Pro comp is underway and the world’s best have gathered here to compete in one of the more dangerous events on the surfing calendar. Teahupoo is almost impossible to paddle into when the wave gets to a serious height and any miscalculation can become very serious, many contestants are injured, and many lose all their confidence when faced with a massive heat.

Here we look at the new-comers, the minor contestants, and we examine their equipment choices, underwear, corsets, back braces.

< We have no bloody idea what this < thing is, but the hire is to write the copy.

Randy here is from Chicago, and he is a guy in a hurry. Rando has his eye on the title at Teahupoo this week and in between modelling the new line of wetsuits, surf T’s, waistwarmers, corsetiers, waist cinchers.
please, someone, tell me .. what the fuck is that thing he’s wearing?

Corsesuit, right, got it .. corsesuit .. ?

…. ok, and in between modelling this new line of wetcorsesuits and copping a few bondage sessions down in Papeete, Randy has been seeking out some inside knowledge of how to prepare for his semi-final when the expected monster swell arrives tonight. Thankfully Chris Davo and Nick Carroll have had a little spare time to sort this out, as have the Brazilian pros.

So satisfying to see the more hard-nosed surfers come to assist a youngster on his first tour. Chris Davidson in particular, we can only imagine the conversation between these two over an afternoon keg at the Sands, illuminating. North Narrabeen, where CD comes from, is well known for its fashion tolerance and goodwill. They even started to sell coffee in cups six months ago, and half price if bought with a chiko roll.

The problem we have here Rando is the shorts, the boardies – where are they man? This rig is fine for the Rio Carnivale and is probably the big reason for all the attention from the Brazilian Pros, (‘esses caras podem partido’)  – but we’re thinking that if he makes it into the final with Fanning there could be some sexual tension. Find some okinuis Rando, some things don’t need to be slapped out there.

The last guy who gave big Mick F a brown-eye in the lineup had to be surgically removed from his leg-rope, all eight feet of it – and all the way to the buckle.

 < – – – Frightening isn’t it, the similiarity between this shot and ^ that shot.

C Davidson, full frontal.

~ Header pic by Sarge

One Comment Post a comment
  1. satch #

    i am at teahupo right now and its flat but we are all over it towing in, paddling in, stand paddle boarding and basically regretting all those made up things just said. but i could be reporting from iceland ready with a handpicked icelandic womens team come down to take over womens surfing but who would care and the icelandic men dont sound near as revolutionary. actually australian men and icelandic women could takeover the mens surfing circuit with a concerted program of wierd proportions and cross-cultural artistic benefits. If australia could team up with Iceland poltically it might change things up, but of course it would be paying pay no respect to Pacific cultures to plot in this way.

    September 6, 2011

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